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And the award for stating the bleeding obvious goes to….

Published by DSAdmin on October 30, 2008

READ ALL ABOUT IT! SAME NEWS! NEW NAMES!

The season is barely a few weeks old and yet already many entirely self-evident issues, espoused as if they were insights of staggering intellect by the so called journalistic talents of the soccer world are boring many fans to tears. Therefore dear reader, if you happen across any articles that start in a similar vein to any of the three described below, you have my deepest sympathy, and full permission, to give up all hope and do something incredibly foolish, like start supporting Newcastle United.

1. ROBBIE KEANE JUST NEEDS A GOAL
Really? This is quite staggering and worthwhile knowledge, because as a football fan I had no inkling that a player, when signed by his new club as a £20m striker, should be expected to score a goal or two. It hadn’t crossed my inescapably small brain that a player trying to make an impression at a big new club, in the full view of the world’s media, would be keen to impress and perhaps trying really hard, perhaps too hard, to get that first goal to “settle him down.” This is a great story for football hacks, because over time, you can just keep all the words and change the names. If Berbatov doesn’t score in the next couple of games for United, this story can be recycled once again.

2. NEWCASTLE FANS ARE ANGRY AT CLUB OWNER MIKE ASHLEY
Mistakenly, I thought that most football fans would enjoy watching their beloved side made into the laughing stock of the English game at present. I assumed fans would applaud their hugely popular manager being run out of town due to the fact that he is no longer allowed to buy the players he wants and to cap it all, the man who has made a farce of the whole thing, wants to make a huge profit on all his efforts! I am therefore thankful to have been informed that this is not actually a good thing, and that Newcastle fans are pretty miffed about the whole thing.

3. MANCHESTER CITY ARE GOING TO BUY… (INSERT STAR PLAYER NAME HERE)
The rather inappropriately named, Abu Dhabi United Group, are reportedly ten times richer than Roman Abramovic! Already they’ve made promises that money will be no object and that the likes of Cristiano Ronaldo, Cesc Fabregas, Fernando Torres, Kaka, Lionel Messi and Uncle Tom Cobley will be playing at Eastlands very shortly. Money may not be an object, history, pedigree and standing is. It’s hard to envisage Lionel Messi stating “Barcelona is great, but really, I want to play at Manchester City. I can’t wait to play for a club that can boast a history of the likes of Lee Bradbury, Kare Ingebrigtsen and Steve Daley.”.

**Photo Credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/26795540@N03/ **

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